What Love & Logic Means to Effective Parenting Essay Example for Free

What Love Logic Means to Effective Pargonnting EssayWhat grows want is to cherish their kids, control fun with them, and enjoy a less stressful family sustenance. in that location is never a shortage of advice from friends, family and even well-meaning strangers when becoming a grow. Nothing shadow ever truly prepare fosters for the actual experience of upbringing chelaren. We all want to be great parents and we all want to do the honest thing, but in addition to balancing all the advice were given against our suffer upbringing and instincts, we still struggle. As parents we set the rules and expect our children to obey them. In other words What I say goes-or else. Previous generations took a a lot more punitive and fear-based approach to parenting, which feeds the illusion that our parents and grandparents didnt have to do much to earn respect it was simply an automatic response by their children.The virtue is much of that discipline was rooted in corporal punishme nt or fear inducing experiences that made their children appear to have respect and did indeed reach their behavior. Love and Logic Parenting offers an affective and beneficial trend to parenting with divulge resorting to corporal punishment, spanking or hitting our children. It is no longer considered healthy or socially congenial to paddle children in school, slap children in the face or spank them with a belt when they do something wrong. In fact, those actions are now typically considered child abuse. Respect nowadays leads to be earned through appropriate discipline techniques not fear. By setting clear rules and expectations, explaining the consequences of their actions, and following through and enforcing those consequences clean and consistently. Modeling, showing a good example, has been proven to affect children positively in every area of life academic achievement, employment, health habits, peer and romantic relationships, coping, as well as communication and confli ct resolution.And fitting as modeling good behavior is important, its also important for a parent to get when they have made a mistake, particularly when it fall outs to their kids. If they see an swelled own up to having done something wrong, they, too, entrust learn to take responsibility when they do something wrong. It whitethorn be desirable of parents to hang out with their children or teenagers and be more alike friends than parent/child. Being a childs friend messt be a priority, our job is to be a good parent This doesnt mean that parents cant enjoy activities and good clips with their children, but it does mean that rules need to be made, boundaries set, and consequences enforced. At times, parents may not be the nigh popular person in the house Sometimes, whats correct for your child and/or family isnt what your child wants. When it comes to a parent/child relationship, there is an automatic hierarchy the parent is in charge. In an actual friendship, some(pren ominal) parties ideally get equal say.But parents arent exactly a friend. Parents are guides, leader, instructors and disciplinarians and when the work is done, and then they can hang out with their children. All parents want a close, good relationship with their children and to enjoy time with them. As parents we get to say when, how and what happens. there may come a point, if parents have been dealing with their childs serious problems for a prolonged period of time, at which they simply give up hope that things can change for the better. If parents are coping with serious issues like substance abuse, mental illness, eating disorders, truancy, aggression or even rebellion, parents may feel like anything and everything in their power to change the situation has been tried. At no time in history have parents been un convinced(predicate) of their parental role, even the best arent sure about whether they are using the best techniques. Society has changed therefore the children of t his generation compared to the children of previous generations have changed.Through the years, parenting styles have changed however, one newer parenting program, parenting with Love Logic offers parents simple and practical techniques that arent as easily found with other parenting programs such as Total Transformation or The Incredible days Parenting Program. Parenting with Love Logic helps parents and teachers have more fun and less stress while raising children. Most parents do not understand how the techniques our parents and grandparents used so effectively just dont seem to work with kids today. A lot of parents today are wondering what to do with their kids and frustrated that the old techniques just dont seem to get the job done anymore. Many conflicting philosophies and books have been written and many another(prenominal) of them sound good, but they havent seemed to be able to do the job of helping children become respectful, responsible and a joy to be around.Althou gh, many ideas are offered with the best intensions, they center on making sure our kids are comfortable and feeling good about themselves in order to have self-concept. However, through Love Logic parents have detect that self -confidence is achieved through struggle and achievement, not through someone notice kids that they are number one. Raising children, who are self-confident, motivated, and ready for the real world, can be a win-win approach to parenting. Children will win because they will have learned to solve problems while gaining the confidence they need to meet lifes challenges. Parents will win by establishing healthy control without resorting to anger, threats, nagging or exhausting power struggles. Love Logic teaches parents to lock in empathy, love, and understanding prior to telling kids what the consequences of their actions are. It teaches parents to hold their kids accountable for their mistakes.When a child is talking back or yelling at you, instead of yell ing back or match marbles with the child filtrate something new and unexpected, dont waste energy simply try telling them I love you too much to argue, or I will talk to you when you when you can talk in a normal tone of voice and see what happens. This will surprise the child when they arent getting a rise out of you. Children need to be given the opportunity to make choices even if the choices they make are not always right ones, it is a choice that they made, therefore, they have to face the consequences and be held accountable. Provide choices by avoiding power struggles, letting the child make decisions, and help them learn from their mistakes. This helps improve parent/child relationships and builds the childs self -confidence. Love Logic offers parents the skills required to feel more relaxed, hopeful and positive with their children. Parents will discover that parenting doesnt have to be as hard as it seems to be and parents can teach personal responsibility and respect w ithout losing their childs love.As parents, many only have a few years left to prepare our children for a world that requires responsibility and maturity for endurance. Many parents are continually stupid(p) how Love Logic changes lives and how the principles work not only with children, but also parents and adults. It has converted many peoples parenting philosophies. With Parenting with Love Logic parents have a place in guiding their children to healthy and successful lives. Parents are expected to be experts, but parenting is a learning process, especially appropriate and effective parenting. There is a way through parent training that has been shown to be effective at reducing child behavior problems including rebelliousness. Parent programs may seem like common sense but many needs to learn techniques and implement them consistently. The instructions given are important in determining compliance the way in which a command is given can often greatly influence the childs unde rstanding of the command.Parents often give orders that are not specific or clear enough to be truly understood by the child and parents often do not give children sufficient time to act in accordance with requests. Techniques that work with Love Logic are forcible statements, choices, compassion, then consequences, diffusing arguments and guiding children to solve their own problems. Enforceable statements are no threats, anger, frustration and no warnings. Parenting programs are offered to help parents in helping raise our children effectively. Love Logic primarily teaches character. The formula is the child makes a mistake, and the adult responds with compassion instead of anger, the child learns from the consequences of their actions. The rules of Love Logic are adults set firm limits in loving ways, without anger, lecture or threats.When a child causes a problem, the adult hands it back in a loving and consistent way. There are three different styles of parenting. Helicopter parenting, where the parent hovers over children and try to save them from the hostile world in which we live. Drill Sergeant parenting, where the parent commands and directs the lives of the children. The Consultant Parent renders the guidance and consultant services for their children. The helicopter parent never allows their children to suffer the natural consequences of their mistakes and choices, constantly bailing them out. This type of parent requires or expects nothing from their child and does not instill accountability in their child. The drill sergeant parent demands that things be done now and tells the child how to think, feel and handle all responsibilities. The consultant parent uses Love Logic techniques, they give messages of personal worth and strength, provide and help explore alternatives and then allows the child to make his or her own decision, provides time frames in which the child may complete responsibilities.Consultant parents model doing a good job, fi nishing, cleaning up and feeling good about it. They use many actions but very few words, and allow the child to experience lifes natural consequences. Family values were considerably different than those of previous decades, and to a great extent, this was the intention of previous generations. Other than the fact that teenagers have more engine room and more material things nowadays, there is no difference in teenagers now as opposed to teenagers in my generation. Teens have been rebellious, prone to experimentation, impulsive, and in great need of acceptance from their peers. This has led them to teenagers making some not so wise choices, both in the previous generations as well as in the current generation.Every generation of parents has worried and wondered if there is any hope for the next generation. Kids and teenagers also have been enthusiastic, generous, energetic, and creative to their schools and communities. Give our children a chance to do something worthwhile, and m ost of them will step up. All they need is a little guidance and a sense of meaning in their lives. The driving societal changes in the 80s and 90s womens liberation movements, high divorce rates, and the need for mothers to enter the work force played into the hands of those starting families wee in the previous decades of the 20th century.All of these influences directly impacted the families we grew up in, and how the next generation would be raised. More often, than not children are growing up in broken homes. The reality is that more children are born to unwed or teenage mothers. I think that the Love Logic program should be offered as a mandatory program for all parents. Through Parenting with Love Logic introspection gives our children the values they deserve, it guides our children to solve their problems it helps in making our children responsible for their own actions and our children will love us for holding them accountable and it offers parents ways to teach our chil dren.Cline, Foster W. Fay, Jim Rev. ed. of Parenting teens with love logic. c1992. Fay, Jim. Teaching with Love Logic. Golden, CO The Love and Logic Press, Inc., 1995 aim Discipline, Classroom Management Ginott, Haim G. Between parent and teenager. New York Macmillan 1969 Glasser, Howard. Transforming the difficult child the nurtured heart approach. Tucson, Ariz. Center for the Difficult ChildPublications, c1998.Grandin, Temple. 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